Tiddlywinks and the Olympics

As the undisputed Thundering Champion of West Yorkshire (more later) I feel compelled to add my not inconsiderable weight to the argument that Tiddlywinks should be included in the Olympic Games.

I must confess to some confusion about what constitutes an Olympic discipline. Take dancing as an example. It appears that whilst Ice Dancing is an Olympic Sport, Ballet Dancing is an art form, Ballroom Dancing is recreation and Tap dancing is …. well, I’m not sure where Tap Dancing fits in. And what about Sword Dancing, Morris Dancing and Irish Dance? I am puzzled as to why Break Dancing will be included in the 2024 Olympics while almost all other dance forms are omitted. What’s going on?

In order to be included in the Olympics an activity must first be recognised as a sport by the International Olympic Committee. From my lofty position, I feel very strongly that if Break Dancing is recognised as a sport by the IOC then Tiddlywinks should be too.

I have long been an afficionado of Tiddlywinks, almost seventy years in fact. It all started in my pre-school years when Auntie Eva and I competed fiercely each afternoon. Once Uncle William had returned to work after lunch the table would be set for our daily match. We tossed a coin to decide who could choose the colour of their winks and matching Squidger, and then there was a Squidge-Off to decide who got first shot. The winks were polished and carefully positioned equi-distant from the egg cup and the battle commenced. It was intense and very serious.

As a child, I had heard quite a lot about “Raining Champions” in the field of sport and each day the winner of our tournament claimed this accolade. After several days of losing to Auntie Eva I mooted that another level of competition was required and thus the “Snowing Championship” was born. After that there was the “Hailing Championship” and finally, the apex of achievement, the “Thundering Champion”, which title I proudly hold to this day.

But I digress. Back to the Olympics, and how Tiddlywinks fits in to the definition of a sport.

1.      Are there rules? Well of course there are!

2.      Does Tiddlywinks require skill or is a game of chance?  Everyone knows that Tiddlywinks requires considerable skill, extreme focus, patience and dedication.

3.      Does Tiddlywinks require athletic ability? For world-class Winkers, like Auntie Eva and myself, training our bodies for peak performance was key to staying on top of the rigorous mental demands of the game.

4.      Is Tiddlywinks competitive? Naturally, and there are progressive levels of competition - as Thundering Champion, I rest my case.

So, come on IOC It’s time for Tiddlywinks to shine.

Oh, and while you are at it, what about Morris Dancing?